Hollywood celebrities have always pitched products to earn a little side money. Heck, sometimes it's actually the primary source of income and the acting is the side job. Television stars sell foods, beverages, insurance, car rentals, vacations, whatever. 

Back in the day, that "whatever" was a lot weirder. For whatever reason, we'd bet that these vintage advertisements would not be printed today. Do you remember seeing any of these?

Doris Day for International Harvester

Image: Collector's Weekly

Hey, say what you will, but it is the only steamroller endorsed by Doris Day!

Sammy Davis Jr. for Alka Seltzer

Image: The Retroist

Holiday bonus for the copywriter who came up with "Deck the halls with plop plop!"

Ronald Reagan for Chesterfield Cigarettes

Image: Twenty Four Frames

Fit for a future president.

Groucho Marx for Kellogg's Frosted Flakes

Image: fishinkblog

From Duck Soup to cold cereal.

Humphrey Bogart for Whitman's Sampler

Image: Attic Paper

Tastes even better than a hill of beans.

Lucille Ball for Phillip Morris

Image: Christian Montone

Now she is the one who should have been selling chocolates.

Don Knotts for Chicago Lumber Co.

Image: Scenes from the Morgue

Nip all your hardware needs in the bud.

Vincent Price for Sun Giant Raisins

Image: Vintage Ads

Nothing is spookier than a low fiber diet.

Rudy Vallée for Fleischmann's Yeast

Image: Attic Paper

Years before he was Batman villain Lord Marmaduke Ffogg, Vallée was a heartthrob pop singer. And a big fan of yeast.

Wally Cox for Smirnoff Vodka

Image: Attic Paper

Cox was best known as beloved TV teacher Mr. Peepers. So much for that charmingly square image, students. At least he drinks it with a straw?

Woody Allen for Smirnoff Vodka

Image: Boy Drinks World / Pinterest

The comedian and filmmaker came out of his shell to promote vodka, too.

Jerry Lewis for Kentucky Fried Chicken

Image: AdVintageCom / Etsy

The nutty comic promoted both KFC and Van Heusen dress shirts. He should have completed the cycle and pitched grease-lifting laundry soap, too.

Carol Burnett for Blackgama Mink

Image: Tim Cameresi / Pinterest

There was no faux in this fur.

Boris Karloff for Northern Pacific Railway

Image: Collector's Weekly

Someone get this man his poison!

Sonny and Cher for the Bible

Image: Collector's Weekly

"Find out where all the music's coming from," read the fine print. A year later Cher released Foxy Lady.