An Idea That’s for the Birds (Not Real Ones)

Surfing through the channels late at night, I hit on one of those two-minute commercials that made me shake my head. It had a name like “Pretty Polly” or something like that, and the whole presentation was trying to sell you this toy singing bird, while disparaging having a REAL parakeet! Basically, it’s a little toy parakeet whose head and beak move as it plays back a recording of parakeet singing. The commercial goes to great lengths to explain how messy a real parakeet is, and how costly a pet parakeet would be- you have to buy a cage, and food and toys, etc. It’s SO much better to have a plastic pal that you can turn on and off, never have to feed (except maybe some batteries now and then), and enjoy his chirping! They show how nice it is to have the faux bird warbling, surrounded by family, and how you can have it chirping in the background while you read. I have to say- as a former bird owner- this bothers me. Sure, if you just want the sound of a bird singing, it’s fine- but to try to sell it as so much better than having a real pet? Would you prefer a toy dog that just barks and moves its head- or a toy cat that purrs- and that’s all it does? Would it be cheaper and better to get a doll of a little kid with a voice recording of singing in it, rather than have a real child? Think of the expense and messes you’d be avoiding! I have had pet birds before- the last, a wonderful little blue parakeet named Shemp, who lived to a very ripe old age, and had a fun personality, sang, “spoke”, and reacted to me. His passing made me very sad, and I have been reluctant to get another bird, though I’m starting to think I would maybe want to try soon- but I would not want to get a toy bird that sings instead of a real bird. I know there are people who perhaps haven’t had a bird, and think that they are almost as passive a pet as some fish- and, I guess that can be the case, but , in most cases, if you interact with your pet bird, they will do the same, and can be very entertaining and, yes, even loving. (Shemp use to do what we call “Happy wings”- a lifting of the wings in a certain way that experts say occurs when the bird is happy- when I’d walk into the room!) Sure, there’s the argument about mess and expense- but, seriously- if all you want is something that makes a bird noise, you could get a recording to play on your Ipod. I guess it just bothers me that the company is trying to sell this as an alternative to a real pet. If you really want a pet- Mr. Battery Bird ain’t gonna cut it. A quick news story- according to the Sun Times, a rabid bat was found on the fourth floor of the Arlington Heights Village Hall! The Cook County Department of Animal and Rabies Control reported that a bat found on that floor was determined to be rabid. The fourth floor, which is not open to the public and contains a crime lab, will be closed, as it is checked for any additional bats. This sounds like a perfect basis for a suburban vampire movie- or, just a typical instance of rabid politics…