Joan Collins Tries Not to "Die-Nasty" in the "Empire of the Ants"- Tonight!

Tonight on METV- Joan Collins has some real estate she wants to sell you-until it’s discovered that it is already in the possession of some oversized pests who have plans for movin’ on up to take over new territory and claim it as the “Empire of the Ants”!

This 1977 film is yet another produced and directed by Bert I. Gordon- whose initials- “B-I-G” – are an immediate tip-off to the size of the six-legged menaces in this film. Based very loosely on an H.G. Wells story, we begin with a brief lecture about ants (pay attention- some facts in this tutorial will be important later)- then, we shift to a tableau of illegal activity- with barrels of radioactive waste being dumped into the ocean. One barrel washes up on a beach, and some of its oozing contents become a feast for …you guessed it- ants!

We are then taken to a party for prospective clients, who suspect realtor Marilyn Fryser hopes to sell property on a nearby island. The pigeons- I mean, possible buyers- include a pretty young woman, a wife with a wandering husband, a middle-aged woman trying to start her life anew, and even some people simply out for a free trip and free food. They are taken to the island land development by Captain Dan Stokely, a strong silent type who keeps to himself.

Marilyn begins the tour, pointing out the various places where- eventually- wonderful houses, entertainment complexes, etc. will be- but are yet to even have ground broken for. At one point, a suspicious fellow, with his wife in tow, breaks away from the main group- and finds something that indicates that the property offer is a scam. He also finds- or, actually, is found by- a super-sized ant!

As the tour proceeds, and the results of an “ant run-in” are found, it seems wise to leave the island- but a seaside infestation strands the entire group on the island- who must find a way to avoid the deadly giant ants and get back to civilization- which may not save them from the power of their large and in charge nemesis!

This movie has several familiar faces, from a pre-“Dynasty” Joan Collins to the star of TV’s “Twelve O’ Clock High” Robert Lansing- along with “CHIP”s Robert Pine , and Pamela Shoop of “Halloween II” and many TV guest shots. We’ll tell you about the production, shot in Florida, the methods used by Bert I. Gordon to create giant ants (including one that kind of ruins the illusion), present a new edition of our drawing game “Too Drawn Out”, as well as a new song, and get a couple visits from members of our Sven Squad!

“Empire of the Ants” begins its reign tonight at 8 pm eastern/pacific, 7 central time. Feel free to jump onto Twitter during the show to live Tweet with a multitude of viewers- just make sure to add the hashtag #svengoolie to your Tweets. In the Chicago viewing area, it’s one more time around the track for “Munster Go Home” at 11 am on CW26.

Speaking of the Munster clan, last Saturday night, they made our show the highest rated program in the Milwaukee area- even beating the major networks! We thank our viewers and appreciate your tuning in.

The holiday season seems to be hurtling towards us at breakneck speed- so now might be a great time to check out the MeTV Mall for Sven gifts, including this year’s holiday sweater- and our new Sven bumper stickers! Just click on the “store” tab here on our website- yes, not only do I have a store- but I must also have an actual bumper somewhere…

Here’s hoping you have a terrific Thanksgiving – we hope you know that we are very thankful for your loyalty and support- and join us tonight for some rather large- and uninvited- pre-Thanksgiving visitors!

Order Your Holiday Sweater Now!