More Thoughts from “Longhair Horror TV Guy”

Okay, here’s a joke that only “Walking Dead” fans will get- (don’t read the rest of this sentence if you haven’t watched the latest episode): I’m starting a rock band named “Herschel’s Leg”. Yeah, that wasn’t a great joke… I don’ t know if you caught it in the “comments” area for my Friday the 12th blog where our “Halloween Horror of the Day” was Jason Voorhees- but- Jason from the first “Friday the 13th” movie, Ari Lehman, left us a nice note-he was in town with his band, First Jason, at the Nite Cap on Irving Park Road! How nice of him to take the time to check in with us! I appreciate all the current inquiries about booking Sven Halloween appearances- but, folks-you have to talk with us about those early- our schedule is pretty full. Also, we appreciate the requests to visit your lawn display or personal Halloween parties, but- we just don’t have the time to do so. Between our work here at the station, and our bookings, we’re stuck-until someone invents the nine day week and thirty four hour days…also- if you want to ask “why aren’t you at (such and such a location) this year?”, the best way to handle it is to ask the management of whatever place you’re talking about- since they decide whether or not to bring us to their establishment. Regarding the “Longhair Horror TV Guy” label in this blog’s title… it was brought to mind as I looked at an advertising circular from one of the stores that has a large line of costumes for sale during the Halloween season. They often have costumes that are obviously supposed to be well-known characters, but for which they don’t want to pay royalties to the company that holds the license to the characters- so they give them “generic” names that SUGGEST who the character really is supposed to be, even though you can tell by looking at the disguise! Among them are: “Italian Plumber” for Super Mario from the Nintendo games, or his brother ‘”Plumber's Assistant”. Is that Luigi? Why, certainly not- it’s just a generic Italian plumber! Yeah, that’s the ticket! Don’t forget the female versions, known as “Perky Plumber” and “Sexy Sidekick”…mama mia! You can also find “Transylvanian Vampire” (…Dracula? Who’s Dracula?),”Papa Gnome” (it’s a blue gnome- not a Smurf- never a Smurf!),”80s Pop Star” (sure to be a “Thriller”, even with one glove), “Wondrous Wizard” (graduate of Hogwarts? Naw, this kid went to a junior college…),”California Girl” (blue hair-Katy Per…?), or even “Monster Bride” ( tall hair with white streaks? Hey, she could be married to ANY body- or bodies sewn together- not just Frankenso-and-so…) THAT’S why the generic rip-off costume name for me might be “Longhair Horror TV Guy”- or “Black-Eyed Chicken Target”-or “Swedish - Scottish Ghoul” (get it- Sven -Goolie?) Before we lose it completely, let’s name our “Halloween Horror of the Day”-and, in keeping with the costume idea, why not have it be a freaky fellow who had a tendency to wear a mask? Yes, it’s none other than the Phantom of the Opera! Behind that mask, of course, is a horrifying face- whether it’s caused by an acid splash, fire, or an actual physically- deformed condition, depending on which story you read or see. The most terrifying, to me, is still the one created and worn by the great make-up master and actor Lon Chaney Senior- which included some very painful devices to stretch and deform his face, including wires and small hooks(ouch!). I recall seeing the silent movie as a child, and, even though I had seen the Phantom face in still pictures before, being just as shocked as ever when his mask was removed! The Phantom’s twisted face and twisted mind allow us to unmask him as our “Halloween Horror of the Day”!