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22 wacky ''As Seen on TV'' products sold by K-tel in the 1970s
Would you like to buy a Whizbee with that Blitzhacker?
Images: K-tel / YouTube
K-tel was far more than a record label. Sure, the brand made its name selling disco compilations and Hooked on Classics tapes through television ads, but K-tel also pushed a plethora of quirky products. It was a true pioneer of the "As Seen on TV" phenomenon. The Canadian company broke through in the 1960s thanks to a few kitchen gizmos designed by Seymour Popeil and his son Ron Popeil.
Ron Popeil would eventually start his own company, Ronco, another giant in the quirky gadget game. Ronco introduced the world to inventions like the Pocket Fisherman and GLH-9, "hair in a can." Commercials for K-Tel and Ronco products flooded American airwaves in the 1970s. It seemed as if some new toy or tool was introduced each week. Several early Saturday Night Live skits parodied these ads, with Dan Aykroyd perfectly emulating the breathless narrator.
We had forgotten about most of these inventions. Turns out, they were not quite sliced bread. But the ads are entertaining as heck. Here are some of our favorites.
1. Bigfoot
These goofy slip-ons simply allowed kids to leave giant footprints in the snow.
Image: K-tel / YouTube
2. Blitzhacker
Eat your heart out, Slap Chop. The Blitzhacker was here first. Also, "Blitzhacker" makes a far cooler metal band name than "Slap Chop."
Image: K-tel / YouTube
3. Bottle Cutter Kit
Were people really just smashing glass bottles everywhere in the 1970s?
Image: K-tel / YouTube
4. Captain of the Starship
Okay, this is music, technically. We suppose. Nevertheless, we include it here as a quirky novelty, because what else do you call two records of William Shatner performances? His acting in the commercial itself is a gem.
Image: K-tel / YouTube
5. Dental Mate
It's just a travel toothbrush that squirts out a runny mint paste. "Extra refills available at point of sale." That's how they get you.
Image: K-tel / YouTube
6. Fishin' Magician
If you purchased a Pocket Fisherman, you were undoubtedly reeling in tons of big catches. Now what? Well, get to cleaning them suckers with the Fishin' Magician!
Image: K-tel / YouTube
7. Hair Magician
Not to be confused with the Fishin' Magician. Again: Do not apply the Fishin' Magician to a child's head.
Image: K-tel / YouTube
8. Husker Du
Yes, this is where the iconic punk band got its name — a Danish board game.
Image: K-tel / YouTube
9. Krazy Katch
You know things are truly crazy with the C's are replaced with K's.
Image: K-tel / YouTube
10. Mood Shirts
An oval on your chest would change colors to match your mood, just like the fad mood rings of the era. What would happen if the shirt didn't match the ring?
Image: K-tel / YouTube
11. Multi-Exerciser
Who needs a fancy exercise bike? All you need are some rubber bands and a 7" record.
Image: K-tel / YouTube
12. Parade of Kitchen Miracles
"Grates cheese like powdered sugar." Plus, it came with a "polyethylene grapefruit preparer," and how did you ever get through life without one of those?
Image: K-tel / YouTube
13. Patti Chef
Smash meat into perfect pucks!
Image: K-tel / YouTube
14. Pin Point
K-tel offered several golf aides, including the Golf King and the Golf Master. But none were cooler than this scope that measured distance to the tee.
Image: K-tel / YouTube
15. Salad Queen
If you spun it fast enough, without veggies, it could also double as a fan and an exercise.
Image: K-tel / YouTube
16. Streek Ball
A plastic football with holes in it is not the easiest thing to toss around. Especially when it's stuffed with batteries and lights.
Image: K-tel / YouTube
17. Style 'N Fit
While this helped you make your own clothes, well… that seems like a lot of work.
Image: K-tel / YouTube
18. Tape Selector
There was no better way to keep all those 8-tracks organized in your car.
Image: K-tel / YouTube
19. Tender 'N' Spice
Stab steaks with flavor! Though, we have to argue that "tough steaks" are "one of life's embarrassing moments." It doesn't even rank higher than having toilet paper stuck to your shoe.
Image: K-tel / YouTube
20. Valley Rouge Wines
Sure, they say, "Fine wine," but remember that could mean "fine" as in "satisfactory" and not "fine" as in "of high quality." Nothing sounds classier than a Canadian wine called Baby Duckling. It was "light, bubbling and delicious."
Image: K-tel / YouTube
21. Veg-O-Matic 2
Star Wars wasn't the only 1970s smash to get a sequel.
Image: K-tel / YouTube
22. Whizbee
"The exciting game that glows in the dark!"
Image: K-tel / YouTube
SEE MORE: The 10 best K-tel compilation albums of the 1970s
Did you shell out money for Dumb Ditties and Disco Fire? READ MORE
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4 Comments
We had the Veg O Matic, that record cleaner below & I always wanted Husker Du but never got it. And of course I had a couple K Tel albums too.
