Who said these lines on The Dick Van Dyke Show?

You know the show, now who said these quotes?

When it comes to furniture-based gags, the opening credits to The Dick Van Dyke Show was its own Ottoman Empire.

Everybody knows and loves TDVDS for its physical comedy. While Van Dyke was absolutely the Prince of Pratfalls, the writing on that show deserves some spotlight, too. Because, after all, it's a show about comedy writers!

Here's the deal: We're going to provide a quote, and you're going to guess who said it! Simple as that, right? Well... sometimes, context is key. So this might be a little bit trickier than you pictured. But give it a shot, and let us know your thoughts and score in the comment section below. Have fun! 

  1. "It's just like my Aunt Agnes used to say..."
  2. "Dwight Heatheron happens to be an excellent writer who is unknown because he gets no publicity."
  3. "This guy laughs at everything! Bet he'll laugh if I say 'shoehorn'... SHOEHORN!"
  4. "At least I'll prove one thing tonight: Television writers marry the prettiest girls."
  5. "I want to take a nap before I go to sleep."
  6. "Millie, in trying to help you, Rob, wrote fourteen letters praising the show, and Alan, and you."
  7. "Noooo. I was at the U.N. the day it happened. Listen, if this guy didn't have those four eyes, I'd have married him."
  8. "I dreamt that Danny Thomas was chasing me and throwing walnuts at me, and every place he'd hit me I'd lose a thumb and grow an eye!"
  9. "The only Dick and Betty Carter I know are Phil and Edna Greenbaum."
  10. "This is getting to me. I think I'm a premature father."

Who said these lines on The Dick Van Dyke Show?

Your Result...

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40 Comments

Jerryfan 2 months ago
10/10. I guess I've watched the show a lot over the years.
JHP 4 months ago
8/10 - dont remember sally saying that (#7)
Suepurr JHP 3 months ago
It was the Danny Thomas Aliens walnut episode
JHP Suepurr 3 months ago
thanks for the reply :) you are correct:)
Coldnorth Suepurr 2 months ago
My favorite episode
daDoctah 5 months ago
But who said this?

"Oh, Rob, you're just awful. Isn't he awful? You're just awful!"
LoveMETV22 daDoctah 5 months ago
Sounds like the episode "Jealousy." Millie says that a lot in that episode, but to Jerry.
McGillahooala 5 months ago
6/10. All guesses. Only saw the show a couple of times.
AmberRAR 5 months ago
10/10-- but I've been watching this show for over 50 years! We are both classics!
Wendy57 5 months ago
9/10
Sorta tricky, but, I managed to tip toe around the ottoman on all but the last one.
JeffPaul76 5 months ago
"You got 6 out of 10 Oops...Looks like you got a little tripped up over the finer details.'' ----I got 2, 5, 8, and 10 wrong.
MrsPhilHarris 5 months ago
8/10 Missed 2 and 8 which was a finger slip. 😁
KJExpress 5 months ago
9/10. I got #5 wrong. Was hoping to ace this one.
Maverick66 5 months ago
5/10. I think I got flustered when I saw how many new quizzes were posted today. 😆
Big3Fan 5 months ago
Got tripped up on half of 'em. I blame the ottoman.
MadMadMadWorld Big3Fan 5 months ago
Should have got 9 of 10, as I did. #4 did me in for a perfect score! Don't remember what episode that line was in.
Snickers 5 months ago
7/10. Why do I have this feeling I did this quiz before?
cperrynaples Snickers 5 months ago
Well, i checked and it's not a rerun! I can spot those right away...LOL!
Snickers cperrynaples 5 months ago
Just seemed to me like I did it before. I know the reruns have a lot more comments but still have that nagging feeling.
LoveMETV22 Snickers 5 months ago
They did a similar( but not identical) quiz a few years ago:
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