Green Acres
Weeknights at 8:30 PM
central (on most MeTV stations)
An absurdist comedy set in the 'Petticoat Junction' and 'Beverly Hillbillies' universe, 'Green Acres' is the surreal imagining of city slickers relocated to a rural life. Affluent New York City lawyer Oliver Wendell Douglas (Eddie Albert) acts on his dream to trade downtown for a country farm, dragging his unwilling, privileged wife, Lisa Douglas (Eva Gabor), along to the removed abode. But idyllic country charm quickly turns to ire and the pragmatic Douglas finds himself perpetually at odds against the insane world around him.
Next Airings
- 9/9 8:30PMThe Price of Apples
"Oliver will make considerable more on his apple crop if he gets his to market first. He hires local highschoolers to pick the fruit and uses their old truck to haul them. As the rickety truck suffers numerous breakdowns, the apple prices begin to drop. Finally, Lisa's hotcakes come to the rescue."
- 9/10 8:30PMWhat's in a Name?
"Ralph Monroe finds herself smitten with Hank Kimball, but discovers that he won't date a woman with a man's name. She asks Oliver to file court papers to have her name changed to something more feminine. While in court, Oliver learns that his license to practice law is not recognized by the state. This sends Oliver back to the books to study for the state's bar exam."
- 9/11 8:30PMThe Day of Decision
"Lisa agreed to try out Green Acres for six months. Today's the day she decides whether to stay in Hooterville or return to New York. Everyone anxiously awaits her decision. In the meantime, Oliver flashes back to their first days on the farm, his physical mishaps around the house, and Haney's lousy products."
*available in most MeTV markets
Stories
Episode Guide
Episode Guide
Season 1
- Season 1
- Season 2
- Season 3
- Season 4
- Season 5
- Season 6
Ep 1: Oliver Buys a Farm
New York lawyer Oliver Douglas quits his job at the law firm of Felton, O'Connell, Clay, Blakely, Harmon, Dillion & Pasteur and buys a farm in Hooterville, sight unseen. The locals are astounded that Haney had managed to unload the place on someone and try to talk him out of it. Laying her eyes on the dilapidated farmhouse for the first time, Lisa bursts into tears.
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Ep 2: Lisa's First Day on the Farm
Lisa gets her first look at their dilapidated-and empty--farmhouse and is horrified. Oily Mr. Haney, who previously owned the dump, took everything with him, including the bathroom fixtures, and tries to resell them to Oliver. Eb, one of Haney's workers, is hired on as their farm hand. Lisa goes out to meet the locals, most of whom have entered a pool wagering on how long the Douglases will stay. Lisa is ready to immediately return to New York, but after a chat with Kate Bradley, she decides to give farm life a try.
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Ep 3: The Decorator
Oliver wants to start farming but Lisa demands he have their house redecorated first. Sam Drucker recommends a decorator from Pixley. Kate Bradley tries to tutor Lisa in the kitchen since she doesn't know the first thing about cooking. Kate starts by showing her how to make something easy: hotcakes. Adding to the chaos is Oliver's mother, who arrives to rescue Lisa from her nightmarish country life.
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Ep 4: The Best Laid Plans
While Oliver makes plans to get the farm in working order, Lisa travels to New York to pack up their furniture. The Hooterville locals begin gossiping, assuming Lisa left him for good. While she's in the city, Oliver's mother connects her with an architect who designs an extravagant country club.
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Ep 5: My Husband, the Rooster Renter
Mr. Haney rents Bertram the rooster to Oliver for fifty cents a day. Unfortunately, he's a "pecker", not a "crower", so he also gets a chicken named Alice. Oliver then sets about getting a phone installed in the kitchen (though the line won't be connected for three months), the plumbing and roof fixed, and electricity via a rickety power generator. Mr. Douglas also meets his county farm agent, the absent-minded Hank Kimball, who takes some soil samples for analyzing.
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Ep 6: Furniture, Furniture, Who's Got the Furniture?
Oliver's mother sends the Douglases their furniture from New York, while she also rides down to visit them. While Oliver and Lisa wait for the furniture to arrive, Eunice is stuck with Uncle Joe on his handcar, getting to Hooterville. Things go bad to worse when Eunice finds herself the target of Newt Kiley's bull, and the Douglases' furniture is delivered to Mr. Haney's instead.
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Ep 7: Neighborliness
Oliver is frustrated because, among other problems, his new plow won't arrive in time for planting season. Uncle Joe has a solution that, naturally, benefits him as well. He charges farmers one dollar each to enter a plowing contest, promising them free lunch and big prizes. This is all news to Oliver as the neighbors on their tractors start descending on his farm.
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Ep 8: Lisa, the Helpmate
Oliver has collected soil samples from his farm for the university to analyze. When the samples are accidentally spilled, Oliver's mother siezes the opportunity to get her son off the farm; she mixed the dirt with products from her cosmetics bag.
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Ep 9: You Can't Plug In a 2 With a 6
It's planting time in Hooterville and Oliver is shocked that the locals make their crop choices based on aches and pains. Back on the farm, Oliver assigns every electrical device a number from one to seven in an effort to keep their creaky generator from blowing. All gadgets up to a total of seven can be plugged in at the same time, but Lisa can't quite grasp the concept.
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Ep 10: Don't Call Us, We'll Call You
With their phone still not connected, Oliver asks Mr. Kimball to put some pressure on his mother, who owns the telephone company. Kimball says he and his mother aren't speaking, but Oliver convinces him to make up with her. His mom is so grateful, she promptly has a phone installed--on top of a pole outside their bedroom.
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Ep 11: Parity Begins at Home
Oliver wants to plant wheat on all 160 of his acres, but the local agricultural committee says he can only do eight. Incensed, Oliver takes his complaints all the way to Washington. Surprisingly, Haney sides with Oliver and prepares to fight the National Guard in "The Siege of Green Acres".
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Ep 12: Lisa Has a Calf
Fearful that Mr. Haney will lay claim to Eleanor's calf, the Douglases decide to keep the cow's pregnancy a secret. The Hooterville gossips get part of the story right, except they think it's Lisa who's expecting.
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Ep 13: The Wedding Anniversary
While Oliver tries to recall how long he's been married to Lisa, she flashes back to last year's anniversary which ended with them in jail. The trouble began when a panicked Oliver found corn bores in his terrace garden. His mother, refusing to keep party guests waiting at the Waldorf while Oliver plays farmer, started tossing his "crop" off the balcony. Pots crashing onto the street below did not please the NYC cops.
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Ep 14: What Happened in Scranton?
Lisa is shocked that Hooterville doesn't have a beauty salon. She calls her mother-in-law who ships out her hair dresser, Claude. (She blackmails him with one word: "Scranton".) Setting up shop on the Cannonball, he gives the Hooterville women new hairdos. Now, they're too "beautiful" for farm work.
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Ep 15: How to Enlarge a Bedroom
After Lisa delivers an ultimatum, Oliver hires incompetent carpenters Alf and Ralph Monroe to enlarge the tiny bedroom. The Monroes have just begun moving the walls when the building inspector, the father of Eb's girlfriend, "disapproves" the project and condemns the whole house. Oliver is left with an open air bedroom without a roof.
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Ep 16: Give Me Land, Lots of Land
Lisa is against buying neighboring property owned by the Watsons until she see their farmhouse. Thinking the house is part of the deal, Lisa sells the Watsons' furniture to Mr. Haney and has their things brought over. All of this happens while Oliver is in New York arranging the financing.
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Ep 17: I Didn't Raise My Husband to be a Fireman
Oliver is allowed to join the Hooterville Volunteer Fire Department if he'll play an instrument in their marching band. As Chief Joe Carson explains, they have more parades than fires. Patiotic speeches follow as Oliver takes his new duties very seriously.
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Ep 18: Lisa Bakes a Cake
Oliver's upset that Lisa listed him the new phone directory as an attorney. He fears he'll be flooded with calls wanting his legal advice. Instead, lawyer Douglas becomes cranky when his phone doesn't ring. Meanwhile, Lisa tackles a formidable task in the kitchen: baking a cake. When Oliver finally gets a potential client, the unlucky man encounters Ralph's plank, Lisa's 20-pound pound cake and Haney's truck.
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Ep 19: Sprained Ankle, Country Style
While fixing the TV antenna, Oliver falls through the roof and sprains his ankle. A parade of Hooterville residents shows up to give their regards while he's off his feet, but instead of sharing the food they've made for him, they crowd him off his own bed to watch Frankenstein Meets Mary Poppins on television.
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Ep 20: The Price of Apples
Oliver will make considerable more on his apple crop if he gets his to market first. He hires local highschoolers to pick the fruit and uses their old truck to haul them. As the rickety truck suffers numerous breakdowns, the apple prices begin to drop. Finally, Lisa's hotcakes come to the rescue.
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Ep 21: What's in a Name?
Ralph Monroe finds herself smitten with Hank Kimball, but discovers that he won't date a woman with a man's name. She asks Oliver to file court papers to have her name changed to something more feminine. While in court, Oliver learns that his license to practice law is not recognized by the state. This sends Oliver back to the books to study for the state's bar exam.
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Ep 22: The Day of Decision
Lisa agreed to try out Green Acres for six months. Today's the day she decides whether to stay in Hooterville or return to New York. Everyone anxiously awaits her decision. In the meantime, Oliver flashes back to their first days on the farm, his physical mishaps around the house, and Haney's lousy products.
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Ep 23: A Pig in a Poke
Oliver is invited to New York to be the guest speaker at a Harvard alumni banquet but he arrives with an unexpected stowaway. Meanwhile, the Ziffels fear that they'll lose Arnold to Mr. Haney, who's trying to take the pig in lieu of a debt that he claims the Ziffels owe him.
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Ep 24: The Deputy
Sam Drucker's off for a two-week vacation to visit his sister, leaving Oliver to take over his duties as deputy sheriff. Complications ensue when Oliver demonstrates how to use a pair of handcuffs to Lisa before discovering that he's lost the keys.
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Ep 25: Double Drick
Tired of repairing the rickety generator that Haney sold him, Oliver checks on the status of his electricity. Learning that his application was never mailed, Oliver decides to deal with the power company in person. He finds that nothing in Hooterville is done simply--or correctly; he ends up with a meter that runs even when it's disconnected and another pole by the bedroom window.
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Ep 26: The Ballad of Molly Turgis
Oliver wants to write a folk song about local legend Molly Turgis, a woman so ugly she was run out of Hooterville. Facts are hard to come by, though, because the mere mention of her name causes bad to happen. Lisa feels sorry for Molly and offers to give her a make-over.
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Ep 27: Never Look a Gift Tractor in the Mouth
Lisa wants to surprise Oliver with a new tractor for his birthday. To keep it out of sight, she has it delivered to the Ziffels' farm. The old couple mistakes it as a gift from Mrs. Douglas, leading Doris to think that Fred and Lisa are having a torrid affair.
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Ep 28: Send a Boy to College
Eb's talent for curing sick animals leads the Douglases to send him to veterinarian school. Unfortunately, his college career is short-lived due to one small oversight.
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Ep 29: Horse? What Horse?
Lisa belives that Oliver's beginning to crack under the pressure of running the farm. After Oliver claims to have seen a spotted horse and a zebra, she calls Doc Watson to give him a checkup. Lisa's attempt to slip Oliver a sedative backfires, resulting in her taking a very long nap.
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Ep 30: The Rains Came
A drought in Hooterville has crops wilting in the fields. Oliver is so desperate, he agrees to pay Haney $350 if he can bring some relief. That's when Haney presents dancing Chief Thundercloud. When the rains eventually arrive, Oliver refuses to pay. He says the Chief's dancing is not what did the trick.
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Ep 31: Culture
The "Every Other Wednesday Afternoon Discussion Club" decides to bring culture to the valley by starting the Hooterville Symphony Orchestra. Oliver calls the women "nuts" for considering such a ridiculous idea. Undeterred, Lisa calls her conductor friend Sir Geffory, aka "Poopsie", to come and conduct the orchestra. What he encounters is the Hooterville Volunteer Fire Department Marching Band playing the only song they know.
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Ep 32: Uncle Ollie
Oliver's groovy nephew arrives in Hooterville on his motorcycle with long hair, hip lingo and no interest in work. Chuck is excellent with motors, however, and proceeds to "soup up" all the vehicles in the valley. The easily influenced Eb is quick to decide he wants to be a beatnick.
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Ep 1: Wings Over Hooterville
When the dreaded bing bug threatens all the crops in Hooterville, Oliver tries to rally the people to rid the town of the menace. He is then volunteered to be the one to fly the crop duster planes.
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Ep 2: Water, Water Everywhere
Short on water, Mr. Haney contracts Willie the Well-Witcher to find a new spot to dig a well. But once Mr. Haney gets water, the Douglases lose theirs. After Willie witches a new well for Oliver, the Ziffles' water dries up. After a few more rounds of this, Oliver suggests the valley get its water from a reservoir. That idea sounds great, until the switches are thrown.
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Ep 3: How to See South America by Bus
A lovely young female farmer comes to Oliver for his professional help. He's glad to oblige, especially when he learns that she can cook. Lisa first becomes jealous of the time the two spend together. Then she becomes convinced they're having an affair, especially after overhearing Mrs. Ziffel describing the plot on her favorite soap opera.
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Ep 4: The Ugly Duckling
Ralph is devastated when her true love, Hank Kimball, stands her up on another date. Lisa's solution is make Ralph more feminine. While she works at the mammoth task, Oliver is forced to sleep in the barn with Eb. Later, the "new" Ralph, complete with false eyelashes that stick together, is presented to the unsuspecting Mr. Kimball.
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Ep 5: One of Our Assemblymen Is Missing
Oliver's back on his soap box, delivering fiery patriotic speeches after getting a bill for the State Farm Unattached Duty Tax. No one in Hooterville seems to know what the tax is for, so Oliver tries to contact his assemblyman. That's when he learns Hooterville hasn't held an election for one since 1922. He and Lisa travel to the state capital to meet the governor and remedy the situation.
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Ep 6: The Good Old Days
Oliver describes to Lisa the book he's reading, hoping she'll have a greater appreciation of being a farm wife. Set on the frontier in 1887, poor farmer Gus Thompson and his mail-order bride Etta clear the land, start a farm from scratch, and have 25 children.
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Ep 7: Eb Discovers the Birds and the Bees
Eb is suddenly smitten with Betty Jo Bradley and asks Oliver for some fatherly advice on romance. Recalling how his first evening out with Lisa cost him a fortune, Oliver advises Eb to make all of their evening's plans. That's just what Eb does--incorrectly--causing Billy Jo to cancel their date.
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Ep 8: The Hooterville Image
The Hooterville farmers have decided that Oliver is ruining the town's image by doing his farming chores in a suit. Oliver eventually gives in to their demand to wear overalls, but they weren't planning on the fur-covered pair that Lisa's dressmaker has designed.
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Ep 9: You Ought to Be in Pictures
James Stuart from the agricultural department wants to do a film on the pitfalls of new farmers. The locals think "Jimmy Stewart" is coming to make a big Hollywood movie so they all enroll in Haney's acting school. In the meantime, Oliver's farming practices prove especially embarrassing for the camera.
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Ep 10: A Home Isn't Built in a Day
Tired of living in a dump, Lisa demands some serious home improvements. Oliver fires the Monroe brothers and hires an architect to draw up plans. Renovations come to a screeching halt thanks to the Monroes' picket line and famous Hootervillian Rutherford B. Skrug.
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Ep 11: A Square is Not Round
The Douglases try to determine which of their hens is laying square eggs. Once word gets out, Haney and a chicken breeder both want in on the action. Oddly, the cube-shaped eggs don't worry Oliver nearly as much as their toaster that operates when you say the number "five".
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Ep 12: An Old Fashioned Christmas
Sam Drucker is selling artificial Christmas trees that squirt "genuine spruce spray" from the top and ooze fake sap from the trunk. Oliver is horrified; he wants an old fashioned Christmas with a real tree, but first he must get a permit from Mr. Kimball to chop one down. After decorating a real tree on Christmas Eve, the neighbors drop by the Douglases for an evening of songs and Lisa's hotscake "fruitscake".
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Ep 13: Never Trust a Little Old Lady
It's tomato planting season and Oliver needs some useful weather information. Hooterville relies on WPIXL-TV's Mildred, a little old lady who prances out of her dollhouse, or Walter, the singing weatherman. Both are constantly wrong so Oliver contacts the Weather Bureau which predicts warm days and nights. With the plants in the ground, Hooterville suffers the coldest night of the year. Incredibly, it's Lisa's crepe suzettes that save the crop from the cold.
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Ep 14: School Days
Oliver spends a lot of time in the principal's office when Lisa enrolls at Hooterville High. In school primarily for a cooking course, she also disrupts history class with her own version of Hungary's past, destroys the womens' showers and explodes a chemistry lab.
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Ep 15: His Honor
Oliver misunderstands when the Hooterville bigwigs ask him to be a judge. He thinks he's being appointed an appellate judge but they just want him to judge apples at the county fair. The Douglases travel to New York so Oliver can get some judging advice while Lisa shops for a robe and wig for His Honor.
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Ep 16: It's So Peaceful in the Country
Oliver's mother needs bed rest so what better place than her son's farm. All she has to do is ignore Alf and Ralph's drilling, Haney's tour group, a group of dancing Sioux Indians and their chief who thinks she's a looker.
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Ep 17: Exodus to Bleedwell
The residents of Hooterville flock to nearby Bleedswell for jobs at the new defense plant. To keep people from leaving, Hooterville reopens its old airplane factory to fulfill its contract with the Army--signed during WWI.
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Ep 18: It's Human to Be Humane
Bored and looking for a project, Lisa becomes the head of the "Hooterville Human Humane Committee". She takes her cause to the extreme, declaring everything from duck hunting to selling chicken eggs off limits. Soon, the Douglases house is a zoo and the locals are ready to run her out of town.
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Ep 19: Never Take Your Wife to a Convention
The only thing Oliver learns at a farming convention is how to get a hangover. He and Lisa meet up with Charlie, a former gangster-turned-farmer, and Wanda, his floozy dancer wife. The more Charlie talks about his farm, the more Oliver's convinced that his shady days are not in the past.
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Ep 20: The Computer Age
A desperate Ralph Monroe joins a computer dating service to meet a husband. Oliver thinks it's a great idea since computers are always right. Lisa thinks they can't possibly take the place of romance, so she challenges Oliver to test their match-up on the electric brain.
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Ep 21: Never Start Talking Unless Your Voice Comes Out
Oliver has to choose between being a farmer or lawyer when he gets an offer to practice in Washington, D. C. The official-looking letter, however, has the locals convinced that Oliver is hiding an juicy secret from them. After ruling out tax cheat and counterfeiter, that leaves only one choice: CIA agent.
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Ep 22: The Beverly Hillbillies
When the cast takes ill, the Douglases take to the stage in a charity production of The Beverly Hillbillies. After Eb "punches up" a script from the series, Hank Kimball plays Jed Clampett, Oliver appears as Jethro and Lisa portrays Granny with a combination Hungarian/southern accent.
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Ep 23: Lisa's Vegetable Garden
According to Oliver, every farm wife should be growing her own vegetables so Lisa starts her own garden. Armed with useless pamphlets from Mr. Kimball and a flask of perfume, Lisa begins work. It's hardly a money-saving proposition after she buys a tractor, farm supplies, and hires Alf and Ralph as her housekeepers.
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Ep 24: The Saucer Season
Once Eb's wild story about meeting space aliens hits the press, tourists descend on the Douglas farm to meet the new celebrity. Oliver's more concerned about the crowd trampling his crops, but the Air Force takes his claim seriously...at first.
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Ep 25: Getting Even With Haney
Tired of Doris' nagging about having to beat their laundry on a rock in the creek, Fred buys a Grabwell washing machine from Mr. Haney. The boat motor in a barrel goes berzerk, spraying water and clothes everywhere before chasing the Ziffels out their front door. Oliver is more than happy to take their case and stick it to Haney in the courtroom.
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Ep 26: Kimball Gets Fired
Ralph is distraught when her beloved "Hankie" Kimball is fired as the county agricultural agent. His replacement is so rude and insulting that even Oliver is plotting to get Kimball rehired. His scheme is to scare the new guy away by fixing him up with Ralph.
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Ep 27: The Vulgar Ring Story
Lisa says that woman in her family must marry an American every fourth generation to keep the huge ring she now wears. She regales Hooterville with the story of her great, great grandmother, the Queen of the Gypsies, and her courtship of an American artist, Cornelius. Much stealing and dancing is involved.
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Ep 28: Who's Lisa?
While fixing the roof, Oliver accidentally drops a hammer on Lisa's head, giving her amnesia. Initially, he's upset because she doesn't even recognize him. He begins to suspect she's faking so he'll take her to New York for the opening of opera season.
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Ep 29: Music to Milk By
Eb becomes obsessed with winning a contest on a Pixley radio station. To identify all the songs, he has to listen day and night. That becomes even harder after Elenaor the cow swallows the radio Oliver just bought Eb for his birthday.
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Ep 1: The Man For the Job
The state committee to nominate a new senator considers Oliver as their candidate. Upon hearing about his credentials (he can read and write), they send representatives to Hooterville to meet the man and learn what his neighbors think of him.
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Ep 2: Lisa's Jam Session
Drucker's store doesn't stock jam since all the Hooterville women make their own. Oliver encourages Lisa to learn how to make preserves from Doris Ziffel since hers are the best in the valley. Lisa learns her trick, but it doesn't stay secret for long.
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Ep 3: Love Comes to Arnold Ziffel
Fred Ziffel objects to Arnold's love affair with Haney's "basket" hound Cynthia. Realizing that their relationship can never work, Arnold breaks things off. When Cynthia performs miserably at the county field trials, Haney wants to sue over his heartbroken hound.
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Ep 4: Oliver vs. the Phone Company
Oliver is finally fed up with the lousy service of the Hooterville phone company. He petitions the state "futilities commercial" for improvements, but they can't help; Hooterville needs at least forty-two customers to be covered by the law. Tired of hearing Oliver boast about how he could run the company better, the owner hands him the keys to the place.
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Ep 5: Oliver Takes Over the Phone Company
Oliver's without an operator on his first day as president of the Hooterville Phone Company. As he wrestles with an exploding switchboard, the locals gossip about how he stole the company from Roy Trendell in a rigged card game. Lisa figures out how to put calls through, but had rather flirt with the president than work the switchboard all night.
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Ep 6: A Kind Word For the President
Irritated by complaints and about how much money he's losing, Oliver raises the rates at the Hooterville Phone Company. His top priority, however, is getting the Monroe brothers to connect his own phone inside the house. Meanwhile, Lisa discovers the magic of cooking dehydrated food.
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Ep 7: Don't Count Your Tomatoes Before They're Picked
Oliver's reign as "El Presidente" of the phone company hits bottom when he hires a farm worker to be his operator. He pays Haney to take the business off his hands, but soon Hooterville is up in arms over the price-gouging Haney Phone Company.
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Ep 8: Eb Elopes
The Douglases find a note from Eb saying he's eloped. While he's on his honeymoon, his cousin Walter will cover his duties. Unfortunately, Walter's experience is limited to bartening at the old Stankwell Falls Lounge. This leads to more destruction than usual on the farm and everyone thinking Oliver's opening a cocktail lounge.
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Ep 9: The Thing
Oliver is tired of paying storage for something neither he or Lisa can recall, so he has it shipped to Hooterville. Inside a giant crate is a genuine Stavinski birdbath that Lisa had bought years earlier for Oliver's birthday. The hideous collection of pipes and faucets leads Oliver to plot "the thing's" demise.
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Ep 10: Das Lumpen
Lisa tells another version of how she and Oliver met during World War II. As a member of the Hungarian underground, she saved him from Nazis by hiding him in a barn and earned him a Purple Heart by poking him in the rump with a pitchfork. They saw each other again after the war when Lisa was a professional cello player.
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Ep 11: Won't You Come Home, Arnold Ziffel?
With Doris out of town, Fred looks after Arnold by himself. When Arnold sees an advertisement for free movies and ice cream, he goes to Pixley. Lisa is convinced he's been pig-napped, so they all go on a search that leads them to a packing house.
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Ep 12: Jealousy, English Style
Over Lisa's objections, Oliver plans on attending a farm symposium alone. To watch over her, he hires a charming young British man as a temporary farm hand. Determined to go along, Lisa plots to make Oliver so jealous of the handsome help that he wouldn't dare leave her behind.
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Ep 13: Haney's New Image
Oliver gets the usual runaround from Haney when he complains about the ancient tractor he'd bought. But suddenly, it's a new, honest Haney who offers to buy back the tractor and the "dump" of a farm he sold Oliver. Coincidently, he's just learned that the Douglas farm is in the path of a proposed new highway. Oliver's soon onto his scheme and decides to make the charlatan squirm.
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Ep 14: Alf and Ralph Break Up
Alf and Ralph announce that they are finally going to finish the Douglases' bedroom, but the project stalls when the "brothers" begging fighting. Lisa hires Ralph as their maid and Oliver can't bring himself to fire her when he discovers she's a good cook.
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Ep 15: No Trespassing
Oliver's crabby attitude leads everyone think he's about to snap from overwork. To help him relax, Lisa takes him on a picnic by the lake. That's where he runs into gun-totin' Ira Hatch, who hassles him about trespassing on his property. When he tells the locals about the old man, they declare Haney the winner of the "Oliver Douglas crack-up pool" because Ira had died 20 years earlier.
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Ep 16: Eb Returns
Eb is embarrassed to tell the Douglases that he was stood up at the altar and took his honeymoon trip alone. He begs an old girlfriend, Cynthia, to pose as his new bride just long enough to meet his "parents". She agrees if it won't take long since she has a big date to get ready for.
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Ep 17: Not Guilty
Sam Drucker calls the law when he discover $300 is missing from his safe. With the investigation pointing only to Frank Nitti, Eb is finally charged when he shows up in a car he paid $300 for and can't recall who gave him the money to buy it.
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Ep 18: Home is Where You Run Away From
A young runaway turns up in the Douglases' barn but refuses tell them his real name. After Oliver reports the child to the police, the boy goes on the lam. When encountering other Hooterville residents, his aliases include Oliver Wendall Douglas, Jr., Fred Ziffel, Jr. Hank Kimball, Jr. and Sam Drucker, Jr.
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Ep 19: How To Succeed on TV without Really Trying
Boy genius Dilly Watkins improves farm life for Douglases with his new electronic inventions. Besides the barn door opener that works when Eleanor moos at it, there's the television camera that sends pictures of the cow to the bedroom set. Oliver doesn't realize the camera is transmitting to all the sets in the valley, turning him into an overnight sensation.
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Ep 20: Arnold Ziffel, Boy Hero
Arnold is opening an account at the Pixley Bank when two robbers make off with a bundle of cash and the pig's five dollars. The pair hides out at the Douglases' farm, taking Lisa, Oliver and Eb hostage. Arnold makes off with their bag of money and takes it to the authorities while the clueless criminals force Lisa to make hotcakes for them.
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Ep 21: Flight to Nowhere
The farmers of Hooterville sign up for a government-sponsored agriculture exchange program to Europe. When they realize the $300 cost for tickets is per person, not per plane-load, they decide to supply their own airplane with Oliver as their pilot.
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Ep 22: My Mother the Countess
On learning that Lisa's mother is coming for a visit, the Hooterville residents go overboard in wanting to welcome the countess. Despite Oliver's protests that she's not royalty, they forge ahead anyway with plans for a parade and marching band.
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Ep 23: The Spring Festival
Everyone in Hooterville, except Oliver, is overcome with spring fever; even Sam Drucker is wearing his spring toupee. Deciding to revive the Hooterville spring festival, Lisa visits the neighbors to drum up support. Meanwhile, Oliver tries to do his planting with Eb who can't understand how to work the automatic planter.
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Ep 24: Our Son, the Barber
Eb's latest career choice is that of a barber. He talks Oliver into paying his tuition to MIT, a mail-order barber college. Eb's sent a dummy head and hair to practice on and receives his grades by mailing the trimmed toupees back to the school. Lisa is excited about Eb's education while Oliver is irritated by all the hidden costs he keeps being asked to pay.
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Ep 25: Oliver's Jaded Past
Lisa's long-awaited vacation to New York is not what she'd hoped for. She's none too thrilled hearing about Oliver's womanizing playboy days or all the wild parties they're invited to. When Oliver's offered a job with his old law firm, he's the Douglas who's tempted by the excitement of city life.
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Ep 26: The Hungarian Curse
The man who saved the life of Lisa's uncle moves in on the Douglases seeking repayment for his good deed. Lisa feels an obligation to help Lazlo, but Oliver is simply irritated by his constant money-grubbing. Oliver's also unfazed by Lazlo's threats to cast a Hungarian curse on him.
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Ep 27: The Rutabaga Story
It's planting season in Hooterville, but Oliver doesn't know what to grow. After testing the soil, he discovers Hooterville is perfect for growing rutabagas. The locals are overcome with rutabega fever, going so far as to plan a "Rutabaga Bowl". To spread the word, Lisa is sent up in a hot air balloon to drop vegetables on people with the message "Eat Hooterville Rutabagas" written on them.
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Ep 28: Instant Family
At Sam Drucker's store, Oliver and Lisa meet their new neighbor who's about to go into labor. After racing her to the hospital, Oliver arrives home to find Lisa's volunteered to keep the woman's four other children in their home. Oliver's nerves become frayed when he's forced to sleep in the barn with the boys and spend all day carrying the kids to and from school.
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Ep 29: A Star Named Arnold Is Born: Part 1
Arnold's performance as a British police dog in the Hooterville theater production of Who--the marquee wasn't big enough for Who Killed Jock Robin?--turns him into an overnight star. Lisa is so impressed, she arranges for an old friend to give him a Hollywood screen test. The Douglases are soon Tinseltown bound, escorting the hammy actor west for his big showbiz break.
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Ep 30: A Star Named Arnold Is Born: Part 2
Oliver and Lisa chaperone Arnold to Hollywood for his screen test. Producer Boris Fedor isn't interested in the pig; he's just using him to pressure a greedy horse to come back to work. When the horse's agent balks, the publicity machine starts promoting Arnold as the studio's next big star. A stunned Oliver, who came along for laughs, can't believe what he's witnessing.
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Ep 1: Guess Who's Not Going to the Luau?
Peterson's Poi Juice is giving away a trip to Hawaii and Arnold Ziffel is chosen as the winner. When the ad agency rep meets Arnold and discovers he's not a human, he tries to disqualify the swine. Famous pig lawyer Oliver Douglas is retained to fight for Arnold's winnings.
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Ep 2: The Rummage Sale
The Douglases are asked to donate old clothing to a charity rummage sale. Lisa is glad to give away Oliver's entire wardrobe, but can't part with any of her dresses. Each has a memory attached, leading to flashbacks of Oliver asking Lisa's father for her hand in marriage, the Douglases' honeymoon in Switzerland and their first party in their new Park Avenue apartment.
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Ep 3: Hail to the Fire Chief
Scheming to get Oliver to pay his way to a convention, Fire Chief Joe Carson appoints him as his assistant. Instead, Oliver finds the Hooterville Fire Department to be inept and ill-prepared. Oliver's call for improvements results in Uncle Joe being voted out and him being named the new chief.
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Ep 4: Eb's Romance
Eb announces his engagement to Loreli Appleby, a girl he met the day before. In an attempt to impress his future father-in-law, Eb succeeds in destroying the farmer's cabbage crop. To get back in the man's good graces, Eb pawns Oliver's cow Eleanor so he can make the Appleby's mortgage payment.
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Ep 5: The Candidate
Fed up with the lousy condition of the Hooterville highway, Oliver launches an attack on their beloved state district representative, Ben Hanks. The folksy, duck-calling, guitar-playing politician proves too wily for Oliver, even when caught padding the state payroll with relatives.
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Ep 6: Handy Lessons
Wanting to be a bigger help to Oliver, Lisa decides to learn carpentry. She buys overalls and begins to study the craft from the inept Monroe brothers. Lisa's talents result in destruction in Monroes' workshop and earns Oliver a punch in the nose.
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Ep 7: A Husband for Eleanor
Oliver plans to leave Eleanor with Mr. Cowan's bull Dudley so she'll birth a calf and start giving milk again. However, Lisa complicates matters when she wants to make sure Eleanor has a good "husband" with bright prospects. No bull Lisa meets seems good enough to marry her "daughter".
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Ep 8: Old Mail Day
It's "Old Mail Day" and Sam Drucker hands out letters that have gotten misplaced in his post office. Having learned nothing from his previous letter-writing fiascos, an upset Oliver complains to the Postmaster General for delivery service. The locals soon turn on Oliver because Drucker's General Store is never open; he's always on his bicycle delivering mail.
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Ep 9: The Agricultural Student
The Agricultural Department is sending a student to learn the ropes from Hank Kimball. When "Terry" turns out to be a gorgeous, blonde co-ed, the men of Hooterville line up at the Douglases' farm to take her to the barn dance.
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Ep 10: How Hooterville was Floundered
After Joe Carson quits as head of the Hooterville centennial celebration, Oliver gets the job. His idea is to stage a re-enactment of the town's founding starring he and Lisa as Horace and Doris Hooter. In the dramatization, saloon girl Doris fleeces Horace out of the money he'd hoped to buy a farm with. Eventually, he gets his money back, thanks to her skills as a card shark, and they marry and settle Hooterville.
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Ep 11: The Blue Feather
Lisa's superstitious nature gets the best of her when a blue feather arrives in the mail. She's convinced that Hungarian gypsies have placed a curse on her and she turns to Mr. Haney to "de-hexify" her.
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Ep 12: How to Get From Hooterville to Pixley Without Moving
After Oliver orders the Monroe brothers to finish work on the bedroom, they confess that they never got a building permit. Oliver storms off to get one himself, only to discover his barn is in Hooterville but his house is in Pixley. Haney, who sold them the farm, offers to hook a rope to the house and pull it to Hooterville with his truck.
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Ep 13: The Birthday Gift
For Lisa's birthday gift, Oliver plans to gets her a horse. Mr Haney delivers one, and it's not your average nag. Its name is Mr. Fred, a talking horse who's also a has-been TV star. Meanwhile, the locals decide that Lisa has a drinking habit and attempt an intervention.
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Ep 14: Everywhere a Chick Chick
Oliver gets into the chicken raising business with the purchase of 1000 chicks. Nothing goes as planned, with Lisa trying to raise them as human children and the brooder breaking down.
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Ep 15: The Marital Vacation
Even though taking seperate vacations was Lisa's idea, she misses Oliver before she even gets to the airport. Her constant phone calls and visits from neighbors irritate Oliver so much, he hops a plane to New York to join her.
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Ep 16: A Prize in Every Package
Criminals rob a jewelry store in Chicago and stash their haul in a grain bin. The expensive gems end up packed in boxes of Crickly Wickly cereal shipped to Hooterville. Lisa knows real jewels when she sees them, but Oliver's sure they're just costume. After taking them to be appraised, the sheriff arrests Oliver for the jewelry store heist.
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Ep 17: Law Partners
Recent law school graduate Brian Williams pitches Oliver on joining him in a new practice. After another of his patriotic speeches, this time about law, Oliver is ready to hang out his shingle. Meanwhile, Lisa is excited about becoming their secretary and Eb is ready to run the farm.
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Ep 18: A Day in the Life of Oliver Wendell Holmes
The law office of Douglas and Williams is open for business, even though the sign has Oliver Mendell Douglas (later Oliver Wendell Wilkie Holmes) listed as a partner. Unqualified secretary Lisa destroys a office typewriter before having the new phone connected to a fire alarm "clanger". Later, to boost business, she advertises a grand opening special with free prizes and discount law services.
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Ep 19: Economy Flight to Washington
The Hooterville Young People's Agricultural Society, comprised of Eb, Hank and Arnold, flies to Washington, D. C. for the national convention. When the stewardess tries to throw the pig off the DC-3, the Douglases come on board to smooth over the problem. With Arnold hiding in "the occupied", the plane takes off with the whole Hooterville crowd aboard.
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Ep 20: Retreat From Washington
With the Douglases in Washington, the "Haney Farm Mindin' Service" leases out their house (for $4 a day) to a couple with six children. Meanwhile in D.C., Lisa and Eb go to the White House to have unannounced lunch with the president, Kimball causes chaos for the Secretary of Agriculture, and Arnold causes problems in a laundromat. Oliver calls an early end to their trip, forcing Haney to quickly dispose of his new tenants.
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Ep 21: A-Hunting We Won't Go
After a friendly doe wanders onto the farm, Lisa starts a drive to ban deer hunting. When the governor arrives in Hooterville for the start of hunting season, Lisa presents him with her petition. He threatens Oliver and Lisa with jail time because her petition promises everyone who signed it a one-hundred dollar payment.
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Ep 22: Oh, Promise Me
The Douglases learn their marriage license is actually a dentists' license. Lisa moves in with the Monroe Brothers until Oliver agrees to have a big church wedding to make their marriage legal.
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Ep 23: Eb Uses His Ingenuity
All of Hooterville is excited about the upcoming big dance. Eb, however, is obsessed with raising $20 to buy his girlfriend a birthday present. Oliver tells him to be ingenious, so he begins leasing out the Douglases' wardrobe, telling people they're strapped for cash. Eb's big brainstorm: sit for ten babies while their parents go to the dance.
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Ep 24: The Old Trunk
Lisa begins reading the diary of Lydia Plunkett who, in 1898, becomes a traveling saleswoman for a corset company. Lydia falls in love with rival salesman Harry Wright, whose career falters as a result of her success. Oliver and Lisa play the parts of Harry and Lydia.
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Ep 25: The Milk Maker
Local inventor "Looney Luke" Needlinger has built a contraption that turns hay into milk. Convinced it will make them rich, Haney and Fred pitch Oliver on investing in the machine, but he thinks they're being conned. After seeing the milk maker in action, Oliver convinces a chemist to give the devise a once-over. What he discovers insures that cows will always have work.
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Ep 26: The Reincarnation of Eb
Oliver, Lisa and Eb talk about reincarnation after watching a movie about a grandfather who returns as a racehorse. Later, when Eb goes missing during a nasty thunderstorm, Lisa is worried sick that something bad has happened to him. She's greatly relieved when he returns home safely--"reincarcerated" as a dog.
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Ep 1: Lisa's Mudder Comes for a Visit
Lisa's mother surprises her and "Whatshisname" (Oliver) with a three week visit. She just became a countess--the title came with an estate she bought--but Eb tells everyone she's the Queen of Sicily. In her royal honor, the locals hold a Ceremonial Day complete with a solid gold wooden key to the city. The highlight is a 21-gun-salute using just one cannon and three balls.
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Ep 2: Everybody Tries to Love a Countess
Two weeks of bordom is finally enough for Lisa's mother. To Oliver's relief, the woman who still doesn't know his name is packed and ready to go. His celebration is short lived once Haney and Joe Carson learn how much money she has. The two become a pair of dueling Romeos vying for her hand and, more importantly, her fortune.
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Ep 3: Where There's a Will
The descendant of Herman, a pig that predicted the weather with his tail, stands to inherit the $20,000,000 Birnbacher estate. Fred Ziffel is convinced it's Arnold, who has the same talent. Fred, along with everyone else in Hooterville, pressures Oliver to take Arnold to Chicago and claim his inheritance. Oliver, however, isn't interested in becoming a pig lawyer.
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Ep 4: A Tale of a Tail
"Noted pig lawyer" Oliver, Lisa and Eb arrive in Chicago to prove Arnold's the rightful heir to a $20,000,000 fortune. While Arnold is given the royal treatment by the hotel staff, the Douglases are treated as persona non grata. The red carpet is rolled up for them all once Arnold's tail predicts snow--in July!
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Ep 5: You and Your Big Shrunken Head
When the Douglases, Eb, and potetentially wealthy Arnold return from Chicago, the pig goes on a gift-giving spree. Mr. Kimball gets a wristwatch, Lisa, an expensive braclet, and Oliver, a shrunken head. With Arnold the target of every salesman in the valley, he hides out at the Douglas farm. Soon they've tracked him down and it's Oliver who has to fight off the pushy peddlers.
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Ep 6: The Road
Oliver's angry over Hooterville's dirt road, especially after learning the money to pave it was appropriated thirty years earlier. Never content to leave well enough alone, he descends on the state capitol demanding that something be done. He makes little headway until Lisa mentions the name of powerful hot dog vendor Big Joe Haney.
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Ep 7: Four of Spades
Lisa the fortune-teller predicts that a mysterious stranger will soon enter Oliver's life. That stranger is Tadpole Talbot, Eb's country music singing cousin. Tadpole hires Eb to go on the road and plug his music, but it's not nearly as glamourous as Eb imagined.
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Ep 8: The Youth Center
Alarmed by the dropping population of Hooterville, Oliver calls a town meeting to find a way to keep the young people from moving away. He (involuntarily) volunteers his barn to be the new youth center.
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Ep 9: The Special Delivery Letter
The Douglases try to pick up a special deliver letter from the Hooterville post office. Sam mistakenly gave it to Hank, who gave it to Fred, who gave it to Arnold...sending Oliver and Lisa all over the county trying to track it down.
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Ep 10: Oliver's Schoolgirl Crush
Oliver speaks about a law career at Hooterville High and impresses one student: a teen girl who develops a crush on every speaker who visits. Her boyfriend is angry at Oliver for breaking them up and Lisa is upset because the girl keeps calling her old.
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Ep 12: Oliver and the Cornstalk
With minimal help from Eb, a stressed Oliver begins planting his corn crop. Lisa tries to be a useful farm wife by making dreadful lemonade which Oliver pours out onto the ground. The next morning at that spot, he finds a giant cornstalk that reaches into the clouds. Suddenly, his farm has turned into a Jolly Green Giant commercial.
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Ep 13: Beauty is Skin Deep
Sam Drucker stocks no "cosmetics" in his store, so Lisa offers to put together a display for him. When 395 cartons of Lady Love cosmetics are delivered, Lisa pushes Sam out the door and converts his business into a "beauty salon". After Oliver tells her she must move her business somewhere else, she sets up shop in their living room.
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Ep 11: Ralph's Nuptials
Ralph finally squeezes a proposal out of a medicated Hank Kimball, sending a delighted Lisa into wedding planning mode. Even though the Haney-produced ceremony goes off without a hitch, the honeymoon with an absent-minded Hank doesn't.
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Ep 14: The Wishbook
The discovery of a Wish Book from 1898 leads Haney to tell the story of Calvin and Tessie Whittaker, who once owned the Douglases' house. When a magic lantern is delivered by accident, Calvin opens a Wall Picture Theater in Pixley, thrilling audiences with a slide of Abraham Lincoln standing on his head.
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Ep 15: Rest and Relaxation
Oliver's old friend, reporter Mort Warner, finds his visit to Hooterville anything but relaxing. In just one day, a pig invades his bed, locals stop by to chat while he's showering, he gets fleeced by Haney and arrested by the sheriff.
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Ep 16: Trapped
Old timbers collapse, trapping Oliver and Lisa in a root cellar beneath their house. Calling for help through the drain in the kitchen sink, the two await a rescue by the addled Kimball and an amnesiac Eb. Their hopes are pinned on Arnold Ziffle and a game of charades.
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Ep 17: Bundle of Joy
While Oliver's in New York working for his old law firm, Lisa and Eb discover little Freddie on the doorstep. Oliver panics when Lisa calls and tells him about the baby, but fails to mention it's a baby dog.
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Ep 18: The Ex-Con
Oliver gives another of his speeches, this one to the County Bar Association, encouraging the hiring of ex-convicts. This leads to his hiring of Willie Dunhill, a man who's spent so many years in prison, he can't adjust to life on the outside; he keeps calling Oliver "warden".
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Ep 19: The Cow Killer
Haney's latest attempt to cheat Oliver could land him in jail if he doesn't repay his $200 by six o'clock. He uses Oliver's irritation over Colby's renegade cow, the Douglases' cow Eleanor and a misplaced phony bovine to his advantage, selling and reselling all three cattle to make money. Along the way, Lisa and Eb become convinced that Oliver is a cold blooded "cow shooster".
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Ep 20: The Confrontation
In just his first day as the School Board President, Oliver has started a grammar school protest. The kids are upset that their mascot, Arnold, has been thrown out for popping his teacher with a pea shooter. Fred asks Oliver to represent his "son" on grounds that he was discriminated against, but all Oliver can do is talk to the school's determined principal.
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Ep 21: The Case of the Hooterville Refund Fraud
Oliver unintentionally provides the motive for the residents of Hooterville to illegally receive more than $500,000 from the Internal Revenue Service. The locals think all they have to do is write in and state their losses--not understanding that they actually have to file taxes first. Eventually, to get its cash back, the IRS invests in Haney's monkey racing track.
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Ep 22: The Picnic
Oliver wants to have a simple, romantic Sunday picnic with Lisa. His plans change with the addition of Eb, his girlfriend, her parents and grandpa, Sam Drucker and his date, Hank Kimball, an old lady from the gas station, an accordion and a sousaphone.
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Ep 23: The Beeping Rock
A wild story told by an 11-year-old about his recent trip to the moon entralls Eb and Lisa. Oliver believes none of it, especially when the kid sells Lisa a "moon rock" for $14. But once the rock stars beeping under the moonlight (and when Arnold snorts at it), he suspects he's the subject of a practical joke. Oliver ships it off to NASA for their scientists to examine.
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Ep 24: Uncle Fedor
Lisa's skittish Uncle Fedor uses the Douglases home to hide out--mostly under the bed and sofa. He claims he's on the run from the Secet Police who want him for smuggling a secret formula. When a man with a scar and another without an ear are spotted in Hooterville, his wild tale starts to seem believable.
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Ep 25: The Wealthy Landowner
In a personals ad, Eb advertises himself as a wealthy landowner. He begins communicating with a woman with a Park Avenue address, prompting him to exagerate his worth even more. By the time she arrives for a visit, Eb is passing the Douglases off as sharecroppers who work for him.
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Ep 26: Happy Birthday
To his chagrin, Oliver learns he shares his birthday with Arnold Ziffle. While Oliver's convinced he's going to be feted with a surprise party, he refuses to spread the joy by getting a gift for the pig.
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Ep 1: The City Kids
Four children from the city spend a week on the farm the Douglases. While Oliver teaches them to plant seeds and milk a cow, Lisa falls in love with the little girl of the group, Lori. The two bond over a batch of banana jelly.
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Ep 2: The Coming Out Party
Lori, the little girl who missed the train back to the city, is staying with the Douglases. Lisa's plan to introduce her to the local children by having a party and gets out of hand; the festivities grow to include Haney giving biplane rides. While Oliver fights to downsize her event, he searches for a replacement part for his ancient tractor.
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Ep 3: Jealousy
Eb won't stop badgering "Dad" to buy him a car, though an increasingly irritated Oliver keeps saying no. Meanwhile, Lisa is busy lavishing gifts on Little Lori. Feeling he's been replaced in the Douglas family, a dejected Eb runs away to find a new job.
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Ep 4: A Royal Love Story
Lisa tells Lori yet another version of how she and Oliver met. In this one, she was living in a Paris apartment with her father, the deposed King of Hungary. While he was plotting his return to power, Lisa was working as a waitress at a sidewalk cafe when Oliver stopped by for six bottles of champagne. The King wants her to marry a baron who will bankroll his army, but Lisa loves poor American Oliver Douglas.
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Ep 5: Oliver Goes Broke
After saying good-bye to Lori at the airport, a distraught Lisa seeks a job to fill her days. When Haney spots her applying at the County Welfare office, he assumes she's there for the free soup. Soon, Hooterville's convinced "dumb dumb" Oliver has lost his money and sent his wife out to find a job.
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Ep 6: The Great Mayoralty Campaign
Mayorial candidate Oliver Douglas faces an opponent when the Hooterville women nominate Lisa to run. While the men plot to improve Oliver's image, Ralph Monroe wages a campaign of dirty tricks against him that includes hotcake batter in his hat and an appearance by Lady Godiva.
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Ep 7: Eb's Double Trouble
The new schoolteacher, Carol, arrives in Hooterville and Eb is in love. He'd asked his current girlfriend, Darlene, to the dance weeks earlier, but now wants to go with Carol. After seeking and ignoring advice from Oliver, Eb listens to Mr. Haney and tells Darlene that he has a wife in Racine, Wisconsin. Darlene's father, angry over this little revelation, takes his displeasure out on Oliver's nose.
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Ep 8: Apple Picking Time
Oliver has his first good apple crop, but the valley has no pickers. He suggests the farmers take turns picking each others' crops, but by the time they get to him, they're worn out. Compounding his problems, Lisa's driving lessons include an unplanned wreck with a sheriff's car.
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Ep 9: Enterprising Eb
Eb learns that $538 is not enough to build a house on the two acres the Douglases gave him and Darlene. His schemes to raise a down payment include turning the the Douglas farm into a bed and breakfast, a dump, and a trailer camp.
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Ep 10: Oliver's Double
A bank robber hiding out in Pixley is an Oliver Douglas look-alike. When Eb spots the crook kissing his moll, he accuses Oliver of cheating on "Mom". Things get more confusing when Oliver's hauled in on suspicion of being the holdup man.
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Ep 11: The High Cost of Loving
Wanting a better paying career, Eb enters the accounting program of a correspondence school. When they mistakenly enroll him in their acting course, Eb belives it's destiny calling. Despite a disastrous attempt at makeup, he studies by to dramatizing everyday events; a boring meal becomes dinner with King Louis XIV with Lisa as his serving "wrench".
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Ep 12: The Liberation Movement
After Lisa hears a women's liberation speaker, she demands that Oliver share the household chores while she runs the farm. While he meets with nothing but red tape while trying to build a tool shed, Lisa gets the permit and completes the building with ease. A skeptical Oliver is in disbelief that his wife is so successful at "men's work".
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Ep 13: Charlie, Homer, and Natasha
Oliver won't take Lisa to New York for a big party, but the issue isn't over. She conspires with Eb to invent new invisible friends, hoping the scheme will end with a trip to the city to visit a psychiatrist.
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Ep 14: The Engagement Ring
Eb is sent packing when Darlene's dad learns he proposed to is daughter with a watch fob instead of a ring. Lisa gives Eb the $2000 ring Oliver used to get engaged to her and everyone is happy--until the father has the ring appraised.
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Ep 15: The Free Paint Job
Oliver's happy to let a paint company put a fresh coat on the house as an advertising stunt. But to everyone's suprise, the wood is so porous, it sucks up the paint as quickly as it's applied. In the kitchen, Lisa is taking three weeks to practice cooking spaghetti and meatballs for Oliver's birthday.
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Ep 16: Son of Drobny
Hooterville throws a celebration for the son of a war hero who Lisa claims delivered secret messages during WWII. Oliver tries to tell them that Drobney is just a "dumb duck" sent to them by Lisa's father, but they think he's just being a sorehead.
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Ep 17: The Wedding Deal
With just two weeks until their wedding, Eb and Darlene still don't have a location for the ceremony. Mr. Haney's first suggestion, to have it for free at a car wash, doesn't wash. His second scheme, which comes complete with a household of furniture, gets Eb's signature on the dotted line. Darlene's father, however, refuses to let her get married on television in a furniture emporium's front window.
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Ep 18: Star Witness
While in Pixley with the Douglases, Arnold witnesses a hold-up of the Pixley Bank. With his voice gone from squealing, a hoarse Arnold is unable to describe the crooks to the sheriff. The robbers learn that one Arnold Ziffle can identify them, so they come to the Douglas farm to silence him for good. They mistakenly kidnap Eb, not realizing that it was a pig who was the whole thing.
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Ep 19: The Spot Remover
Lisa's Uncle Boris sends her a jar of his incredibly effective cleaning fluid. It removes stains from suit coats and rugs, not to mention green from toupees. Seeing dollar signs, Haney sneaks a sample and has it analyzed; the secret formula ends up being a magical recipe for cabbage soup.
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Ep 20: King Oliver I
With the state bankrupt, the governor raises taxes by 52% and shuts down most services. Hooterville responds by blowing up the bridge out of town and seceding from the state. The residents start their own monarchy, anointing Mr. Douglas as King Oliver I.
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Ep 21: A Girl for Drobny
Lisa concludes that Drobny, the duck she received from her uncle in Hungary, is lonesome. She invites Arnold over to play with him, but alas, the language barrier is too great to overcome. Lisa's next plan is get Drobny a girlfriend, so she talks Oliver into buying a female duck from Mr. Haney. Soon, love is in bloom for Drobny and Gertrude.
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Ep 22: The Carpenter's Ball
Ralph wants Hank to ask her to the Carpenter's Ball, but he comes up with feeble excuses to avoid going. Planning to get the two together at the event, Lisa asks Hank to be her date to the party. In no time, Hooterville is convinced that the Douglases' marriage is on the rocks and that Lisa and Hank are running off to Acapulco.
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Ep 23: The Hole in the Porch
Oliver's temporary fix on his dry rotted front porch proves pointless when Kimball removes the new board and promptly falls through. The injured patient, recuperating in the Douglases' bedroom, becomes a major aggravation with his constant kazoo playing, fawning nursemaid Ralph, and his "attorney" Mr. Haney trying to soak Oliver for $50,000.
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Ep 24: Lisa, the Psychologist
Lisa and Oliver each take a college course in Pixley. Oliver chooses one dealing with farming while Lisa studies psychology. After just a few lessons, everyone in Hooterville is running to "Doctor Lisa", who solves their problems with logical reasoning. An exasperated Oliver's had enough when he has to make an appointment just to see his wife.
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Ep 25: Hawaiian Honeymoon
Lisa cons Oliver into taking a 'fifth' honeymoon together, this time in Hawaii. When they check into the honeymoon suite, they are unaware that the hotel manager's daughter, has given her friends the suite for their honeymoon also. Since the suite has two bedrooms it's just a case of both couples avoiding each other while on their honeymoon(s), for a while anyway.
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Ep 26: Ex-Secretary
Oliver contacts Carol, his one-time secretary, to find out where she'd had his watch repaired years earlier. In this pilot for a proposed series, Carol now works for a California realtor. She prevents her current boss from being conned by man that Oliver Douglas had tried to indict back in New York.
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