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10 vintage Halloween foods that were more trick than treat
Does anyone really want mummified grapes?
When it comes to eating on Halloween, one word comes to mind: candy. As a child, the holiday was all about trick-or-treating for sackfuls of chocolate and sugar confections.
Everyone had their favorites (perhaps the snack-sized Snickers) and their least favorites (maybe the Bit-O-Honey bars) but we could all agree on one thing — only a true monster would hand out dried fruit. And with that in mind, we begin this look back at bizarre Halloween eats with the shriveled snack no costumed child wanted.
Raisins
Sun MaidLook, Halloween is not the time to be healthy. Even two out of the three children appearing in this advertisement had to hide their face for acting so enthusiastic about desiccated grapes.
Jack O' Lantern Salad
First you try to sneak raisins into our pillow cases, now you're encasing carrots in Jell-O.
Banana Spook Cake
This probably doesn't taste too bad, but the bananas look like Mr. Bill just before he gets squashed.
Crisco Mincemeat Cakes
CriscoA true trick? What appears to be a cupcake is actually a fist full of mincemeat hiding under frosting. And that "Dinner-in-a-roll" looks like a growling monster.
Spooks Pickle-Potato Salad
Ladies Home Journal / Click Americana
Nothing about this is legitimate. Even the jack-o'-lantern is just a coconut wrapped in cellophane.
Vegetable Beef Loaf
A&PThis looks like the grave of Mayor McCheese.
A stack of olive loaf
Rath Black Hawk MeatsOkay, the raisins are starting to look pretty good compared to some wet slabs of lunch meat.
Pig and peanut butter sandwiches
These sandwiches seem cute enough until you read the fine print. Then you realize they are stuffed with deviled ham, peanut butter and mayonnaise. Even if it called deviled ham, it has no place in Devil's Night.
The "Weeny Witch"
Skinless"Skinless" has a horror-film sound to it, doesn't it? What was it with all the piles of processed meats?
Snow Ghost Pie
Hershey'sFrankly, this chocolate-and-whipped-cream pie looks rather delicious. But we included it for the bizarre short story printed on the page. It's written from the perspective of a kid whose grandma makes a chocolate pie. A handyman happens to be shoveling the family's driveway. The kid writes, The handyman grabbed me and whispered, "Lissen, when your grandma ain't lookin' get a big piece of that pie for the snow ghost." Just your average charming Hershey's tale about a handyman threatening a kid for dessert.
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Just a snapshot in time!
He also writes a column for the Star-Tribune {Minneapolis}. Before he did that, he did stuff for I think a PBS station. A couple of weeks ago, I ran across on You Tube a "short" that he did, about Reading addicts. {I think it was a PSA to get kids to read more.} It was really well done. Treated, just like one was an alcoholic, or drug addict. "Hello, my name is James Lileks, and I'm a readaholic." {Something like that.} Shows him wondering the streets, begging someone for money. One guy said no, that he'd only spend it on novels. Walking down the street reading and reading, when he is supposed be cutting back. Going through withdrawls. As I said, really well done! The man really is very funny. One final thing: I LOVE G.O.R.F!
